Project 2 Preliminary Critique

This is an archive subforum of the previous version of Project Three. This is for inspiration only. DO NOT POST YOUR PROJECT THREES HERE.
Locked
z1claudia
Posts: 46
Joined: Wed Jan 30, 2019 2:14 pm

Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by z1claudia »

Hi I chose a local roller derby team website http://www.battlebornderbydemons.com/ . The team is still active but their website is dead. It bothers me because I'm sure other girls besides myself are interested in learning roller derby but have a hard time finding information. In a way I hope to possibly create a good enough website to present/pitch to them. So it can inspire and inform others to try out the sport or even just support the team.

I chose two different styles, a grungy style and a more organized style.

Their original website looked like they wanted a more grittier, darker design. Which is why I personally prefer the first 4 designs. I've never done a grungy style so I'm still playing around with it. Let me know how I can improve it.

The second set of designs I still like but I see it as more generic and in a way, not representing the image I think they might be trying to put out there. I feel like this would work for Reno's other Roller Derby team instead https://sierraregionalrollerderby.org/.

Give me some feedback please. Let me know any mistakes you noticed or if any design choice I made confuses you. Thank you.
Attachments
project2-web-4.jpg
project2-web-about-4.jpg
project2-mobile-home.jpg
project2-mobile-about.jpg
project2-web-2.jpg
project2-web-about-2.jpg
project2-clean-mobile-home.jpg
project2-clean-mobile-about.jpg
Claudia Zamudio

erino
Posts: 38
Joined: Fri Feb 01, 2019 12:48 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by erino »

Your designs are on point, they express what your audience want. I get that determination, fearless, and fun vibe. They all work great, but my eye goes towards the top designs. I have no suggestion, great job!
____________
Erik Reyes

itsdrrlcarden
Posts: 74
Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:09 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by itsdrrlcarden »

i really like the grungy looking one (green one). I just feel like it represents roller derby the best. Its a bit edgy and adds personality. I would continue working with that one and just fix up margins and some image placing. Good start!
-Darrell Carden GRC175

John1612
Posts: 41
Joined: Wed Jan 30, 2019 8:04 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by John1612 »

Hi classmate this is Charlie Johnson:

When in doubt go green! I really enjoy the green design. I think it's perfect as is.

lewlewland
Posts: 44
Joined: Wed Jan 30, 2019 8:46 am

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by lewlewland »

These designs are awesome! I really enjoy them both I think that they both portray what you're going for very well. I really like the design and layout of the first set with green, however I sort of like the colors of the black/red/pink more. I personally think it would be really cool if you were to use those colors in the first design but these all still work really well either way.

Lewis
Image

User avatar
Andramada
Posts: 27
Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2019 6:58 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by Andramada »

Your second design is very strong with its bold red banner in front. The banner definitely calls to action and captures the attention of the audience. The font choices balance each other very well and adds to the energy of the sport. Your title is in the perfect spot for it sits right where the users eyes want to go. The navigation bar is very unique clean and visually interesting.
Andramada, j.stille

The world has many opportunities but we are too blinded by the tragedy and losses dealt to us. So we blame fate for our misery, we blame others. We even blame God. And we fail to actually gain the will to change our circumstances.

User avatar
Gr8K8
Posts: 121
Joined: Wed Jan 30, 2019 5:55 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by Gr8K8 »

While I think both designs work very well with colors, I like the green design more overall. I think it's interesting, and grittier than the pink/black.
I really like how you played with the pictures to make the white pop out. I'd maybe tweak the opacity on some of them though, because if they're too transparent it becomes a little muddled with that circle happening in the background.
I also really liked how you editied the photo in your about me section. However, I feel like that particular photo might be better suited on a different page, and you could perhaps consider doing one of the group pics for that section.
The only other suggestion I can think of is I think your navigation buttons are slightly awkward as they are now. There's a lot of empty space to the right of them. I think you could spread them out across that red bar a little more and maybe bump up the font size just a touch. Nice job!
Kaitlin Wallberg

“I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IarF06JKANg

User avatar
Instructor
Site Admin
Posts: 1945
Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2011 8:51 am

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by Instructor »

Hm. An MMA fighter on your first design and now a roller derby team. I'm sensing a theme here.

I concur with you. I like your splatterpunk first design better. It's basically textbook grunge. The colors are perfect, the orange and green working together to reinforce the decayed industrial feel. Picture perfect distressing throughout. The website looks like a mix between a 70s grindhouse movie poster and a ransom letter that was then left on the floor of a busy factory for about thirty years. Your navigation is easy to see and use. Your type choices are spot on, too. A great blend of stencil, script, and sans-seif typefaces, all of them messed up. Great use of photos to make texture, like you did on your Project One preliminary. I especially like the group shots with the eyes blacked out. It looks like the cover of an indie album.

Make sure you lave room for your bodyopy to expand in the composition. I'd enlarge the content area on your mobile version as well. It might be a bit small on phones.

Excellent work!
"Inspiration is for amateurs. The rest of us just show up and get to work." — Chuck Close

Michael Ganschow-Green - GRC 175 Instructor
mganschow@tmcc.edu | 673-8200 ext.5-2173

User avatar
stars2night
Posts: 46
Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2019 11:09 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by stars2night »

I think I like the green one a bit better. I really like the red and black one, but the red is so bright, it makes me think of blood and death and though its a bloodthirsty sport, feels a little too overpowering. I like the contrast, but it also makes me cringe with the associations as the skaters are covered in a layer of red/blood.

I absolutely love the grunge and texture you have put on the background of the green one. I really like your grungy About background white box. The edges are so cool. I also like the chunk taken out of the red title bar, but I actually would like to see you dirty up the edges more for that title bar. I like the green ones with the girls with black boxes across their eyes better. I wish they didn't have black boxes over their eyes, but I think that works better than the collage.

I really liked the navigation buttons on the red and black version. I liked the slant and the staggering of the buttons. Very cool. I really like the direction you are going.
- Katrina Allen (Alera)

Image

Unicorn_Service
Posts: 42
Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:44 pm

Re: Project 2 Preliminary Critique

Post by Unicorn_Service »

I do think both designs are quite etsethic. Not a preference over either of them. I do give praise of the strong typography; this is a strong exbhibit of skill here.
readability and legibility are also great.

Here, you get a gold star.Image

Locked